Simplicity...faith like a child

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight." Prov 3:5-6

"Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Marry has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." Luke 10:41-42

The desires of my heart lately:

1. To be a good wife...

2. To be a good daughter and daughter-in-law...

3. To be a good servant of God...

4. To be a good employee...

5. To be a good friend...

But I have lost the simple faith of a child in the midst of fulfilling all those desires.

I have been trying too hard to make the right decisions, to keep my priorities, to prevent myself from falling short of anyones's expectations etc. Sometimes, its just so hard to fulfill every single role to perfection and it's hard to make decisions. I have been too distracted by trying to get things right.

I can imagine God looking at me and urging me to stop trying so hard. At the end of the day, His love for me is not dependent on any of that. Why be a Martha and tire myself out? It's unnecessary.

To rest in His love and to acknowledge Him in all my ways..that's sufficient. I hope I will stop focusing on whether I have made the right decisions, but whether I have acknowledged Him in every decision.

God sends me the same message time and again, "Your world need not be so complicated...my little girl, stop thinking so much =)"

I LOVE MY CARE GROUP!

Just came back from cg at Yisheng's place...I just love my caregroup so much.

Been a little discouraged lately over some issues which have been burdening me..but God really encouraged me through the time of fellowship with my dearest brothers and sisters today.

Last week, we were sharing about the choice of a new cgl for year 2008...no one was ready to respond then, so we took a week to pray about it. Praise the Lord! He worked in the heart of our dear brother who responded in obedience today.

Our current cgls KS and YN told us to pray and then to write on a slip of paper what God had impressed upon our hearts regarding ministry in cg next year. Praise God! everyone gladly wrote about how we would like to contribute to cg next year. And..our dearest brother who responded in obedience said "YES" to being a cgl!

Thank God..we have a new CGL who has been called by Himself. We are certain that God will bless our leaders in 2008 especially since all of us have expressed our full support for them.

I am encouraged because I know God's presence was and will continue to be with this caregroup...

I just love my cg so so so much...haha =)

Baggages and God's healing

Din know that we can carry our baggages from one workplace to another.

I have been so accustomed to some negative things in the previous workplace that I actually find it difficult to embrace the good stuff in the new firm now.

No place is perfect...But I thank God for this new phase in this new firm.

Step by step..by His grace...I am still learning how not to carry burdens which are not mine and live in freedom.

Do I believe Him with all my heart?

Realised today that I have not been recognising certain hurts in my life.

But thank God for revealing everything today. That's the first step to healing.. I know that..

I find myself having trouble believing the following truths at some point or another:

1. That God delights in me and is pleased with me

2. That God will never leave me nor forsake me

3. That God wants to bless and to prosper me.

4. That God is perfectly fine with me =)

Been struggling to believe the above truths since young... I know I have grown and its been getting easier but the struggles have not disappeared.

But I thank God.. because He never fails to challenge me to BELIEVE and to hold on to my anchor verse:

1 JOHN 4:18

"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love."

Now my heart is once again freed to say that God LOVES me....

Blogging from office..haha

Haha..for once, I can blog from my office computer.. but after office hours lah.

My new firm is above my dad's firm..

My new boss is a nice person.. not a slave driver though I believe I have quite some work to do.

My new computer is an ACER laptop which is pretty cool.. with webcam installed but I won't use it lor..

My room, unlike the one in my previous firm, does not have a view but it's pretty cosy lah

I have my own HP printer..

eh.. what else.. All in all seems ok for now.

A few trials coming up though.. exciting cos I get to learn and see my boss in action.. but the preparation could be tiring.

BUt that's the road to discovering whether God wants me to be a litigator! haha

leaving office soon..

Joyful! Joyful! =)

Friday was my last day in Yeo-Leong & Peh..I was so sad I wanted to cry. I will miss my colleagues who are so lovable. Afterall, they have been so much a part of my life for the past 2 years. I hope I can keep in contact with them..may not be easy cos they are at Tanjong Pagar and I am at Raffles Place.

Starting to work in the new firm on wednesday. Not sure how that's going to turn out but just trusting God for now. =) I know that by His grace, I will be able to face all the challenges ahead of me. I just hope that the working environment allows me to continue serving God actively.

YF came over to our place yesterday. Wenguang and myself had such a great time conducting the workshop. It's the first time we led a workshop together as a married couple. We had to learn how to coordinate with each other. Thankfully, we managed to do so without much conflict =) haha.. topic of the BGR workshop was "UNDERSTANDING AND CELEBRATING DIFFERENCES".

CG came over in the evening too. As I always say...I love my CG! We had such a good time of sharing and everyone was very open. I really thank God for His presence in the group. Moving on to a new year, we just hope to see each others' faces every week and we want to do much more in God's kingdom as a CG.

All in all, I woke up this morning with a very grateful heart. Serving God brings great joy to my soul, always!

Xie Look-alike meter

Yam & Kel - happily married

1.5 hours in the kitchen

haha! Guess what? I spent 1.5hours in the kitchen this evening just to whip up a decent meal for Wenguang. Thank God, although I took really long to cook the dishes, they turned out pretty good. At least Wenguang found them so hahaa...

I cooked:

1. Potatoe and pork in soya sauce (din realise wg loves soya sauce stuff until tonight)

2. Brocolli fried with garlic

3. Steamed sea bass (is that how you spell it? haha) - turned out a little salty though

Well..I think I made a mess out of the kitchen, used so many plates, so many pots etc haha..for just 3 dishes. And I din get my sequence right. I was so nervous that I decided to steam the fish first, that really should have been the last dish. Ah well..I had fun..and now wenguang is cleaning up voluntarily after a good meal.

Oh yes...haha..still learning how to cook brown rice..how much water to add..eh..the rice tonight turned out quite bad. In my own words just now, 3.5 points out of 10. haha..wenguang equated them to peanuts..can you believe it! haha.

The day started out with much heaviness and negative emotions..as usual. I had the "I don't feel like working" emotion. Weekends are always filled with so much activities with brother and sisters..so enjoyable.. Kel & HY got married on saturday! We had so much fun helping them. WG was carpark ic and I was usher ic..so so fun!

But the prayer time early in the morning changed my heart. I know that God wants me to rely on him daily for strength, joy, peace, love etc. Work is where God puts me through the greatest test. Do I still love Him and glorify Him even in the midst of work?

I know why I am still in the workforce..cos that's where God knows I will have the greatest difficulty in living like a real christian. Training ground...=) Until the day God calls me out of the workforce, I shall be strong and courageous and live each day in His abundant promises!