Some stuff happened over the weekend. long story...
The event was crushing in a way...and all I could do through the night was to remember the verse that says,
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18
It still hurts...throughout sat night to sunday morning, I felt that there's no way I would be able to regain strength to move on.
But thank God...some dear sisters encouraged me with their prayers, listening ears and support. (sisters, you know who you are: thank you so much for everything) The love, counsel and care showered upon me gave me strength.
Prayed with hubby, who was not feeling any much better really...(save that he was really much stronger than me emotionally)...and thank God, He lifted our souls from the heaviness.
If not for His grace, both of us would not have the strength to move forward with courage and embrace whatever challenges might be ahead.
I like a verse which hubby mentioned,
"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." Romans 12:12
Without God, some circumstances can really crush us very badly. But thank God.. there is always hope in Him.
Although the sadness still lingers...it's different. I know.
Such circumstances put me to a test..."Can I still believe that God is loving, good, faithful, almighty and gracious?"
Monday, March 31, 2008
Monday, March 24, 2008
It's all in the mind...
Haiz.. the same realisation AGAIN.
You know how worries, fears, stress etc. get magnified when we dwell on them?
Objectively, it's not so bad, but when you dwell on them and keep letting your soul feed on them, it starts to "seem" really bad.
Once again reminded about the parable...worries of this life crowd out His Word in us.
Woke up this morning with the fears, stress etc...so decided to stop dwelling on those stuff and start memorising scripture. GUESS WHAT! As expected, everything went back to normal...*PEACE*
Sometimes I wonder why I chose to put myself through so much...spoil the long weekend... when PEACE is restored with something as simple as scripture memory.
You know how worries, fears, stress etc. get magnified when we dwell on them?
Objectively, it's not so bad, but when you dwell on them and keep letting your soul feed on them, it starts to "seem" really bad.
Once again reminded about the parable...worries of this life crowd out His Word in us.
Woke up this morning with the fears, stress etc...so decided to stop dwelling on those stuff and start memorising scripture. GUESS WHAT! As expected, everything went back to normal...*PEACE*
Sometimes I wonder why I chose to put myself through so much...spoil the long weekend... when PEACE is restored with something as simple as scripture memory.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Mixed feelings - need time out
Some exciting things' been happening. Action on God's part which both WG and myself find amazing... We are thankful for how He has been leading us and excited to continue watching Him moving ahead of us.
Something that I've learnt through the recent experiences: He makes all things beautiful in His time.
God has everything planned out, and He holds everything in His hands. Nothing escapes His attention. We just have to watch and wait.
But I've been experiencing some mixed feelings as well...anxieties from work and future plans... children, finances, career, priorities etc. It's a fine line between planning and worrying, really. Feel that I need to take time off to sort all that out again. But am thankful for LB and MH who took time out for the both of us yesterday. We called them out of the blue and they agreed to meet up immediately. Their experiences and journey with God encouraged us both. haha..it really helps to have bigger brothers and sisters around.
Regarding work, sometimes I do tell God that "I want out"... cos the frustrations and stress can be difficult to handle. I am afterall a woman. But...He has His timing and I cannot rush things.
Well.. a step at a time...a day at a time. His mercies are new every morning.
Something that I've learnt through the recent experiences: He makes all things beautiful in His time.
God has everything planned out, and He holds everything in His hands. Nothing escapes His attention. We just have to watch and wait.
But I've been experiencing some mixed feelings as well...anxieties from work and future plans... children, finances, career, priorities etc. It's a fine line between planning and worrying, really. Feel that I need to take time off to sort all that out again. But am thankful for LB and MH who took time out for the both of us yesterday. We called them out of the blue and they agreed to meet up immediately. Their experiences and journey with God encouraged us both. haha..it really helps to have bigger brothers and sisters around.
Regarding work, sometimes I do tell God that "I want out"... cos the frustrations and stress can be difficult to handle. I am afterall a woman. But...He has His timing and I cannot rush things.
Well.. a step at a time...a day at a time. His mercies are new every morning.
Thursday, March 20, 2008
Super tired from thinking
One thing that I really dislike about my work....Intensive reading and thinking about legal issues, cases etc...never ending.
Why arent' things more straightforward? Right now, my brain feels super fried AGAIN...
Looks like I need to find ways and means to increase my brain capacity. It's easier if life is just all about work.
But the truth is, it isn't, and I don't want it to be. Find myself having to switch channels a few times in a day...if only I spongebob!
I need some rest from everything now...so that I can create some space to remember my dear Lord Jesus and what He has done for me.
Why arent' things more straightforward? Right now, my brain feels super fried AGAIN...
Looks like I need to find ways and means to increase my brain capacity. It's easier if life is just all about work.
But the truth is, it isn't, and I don't want it to be. Find myself having to switch channels a few times in a day...if only I spongebob!
I need some rest from everything now...so that I can create some space to remember my dear Lord Jesus and what He has done for me.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Heart of a godly young woman
Listened to a sermon which I downloaded..
Learnt some very impt lessons from Titus 2:4-5
Marks of a godly young woman:
1. loves her husband
2. loves her children
3. self-controlled
4. pure
5. busy at home
6. kind
7. subject to her husband
so that no one will malign the word of God.
Wow.. 'malign the word of God'...serious consequences ya.
I have especially chosen to bold 5. and 7. because I find those to be highly lacking in most young modern woman nowadays. Which probably explains why many marriages breakdown.
O Lord, please teach us, young woman, to obey Your Word and not always want to have our way. =)
I still have a long way to learn...haha
Learnt some very impt lessons from Titus 2:4-5
Marks of a godly young woman:
1. loves her husband
2. loves her children
3. self-controlled
4. pure
5. busy at home
6. kind
7. subject to her husband
so that no one will malign the word of God.
Wow.. 'malign the word of God'...serious consequences ya.
I have especially chosen to bold 5. and 7. because I find those to be highly lacking in most young modern woman nowadays. Which probably explains why many marriages breakdown.
O Lord, please teach us, young woman, to obey Your Word and not always want to have our way. =)
I still have a long way to learn...haha
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Be patient
God's been teaching both WG and myself this lesson..."Be patient".
Be patient to see God come through with His promises
be patient and trust that step by step He will lead us to where He wants us to go
be patient to sow seeds which will one day reap a harvest
be patient even though it means bearing heavy burdens in the meantime
be patient and be faithful to do just what He has called us to do in this season and time
As human beings, we often want to see immediate results. Bearing the burden of a vision which may take many years to take shape is not very "us". But God's perspective on time is so different from our concept of time.
"But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day." (2 Peter 3:8)
It isn't easy, but we are still thankful, for He has promised us that we are not alone on the journey. He has in fact sent some people to walk alongside us. (met up with Kel and xm this afternoon.. thank girls for your support =p)
Most importantly, we are so glad to have each other on this journey. =)
The Lord reminded me through quiet time today that we have been given a ministry & word of RECONCILIATION...Good Friday's coming up... a great opportunity to meditate on what Jesus has done for all mankind.
A phrase by the author of my devotional material which I really like:
"They need to be reconciled to God and walk in the fullness of that reconciliation."
Be patient to see God come through with His promises
be patient and trust that step by step He will lead us to where He wants us to go
be patient to sow seeds which will one day reap a harvest
be patient even though it means bearing heavy burdens in the meantime
be patient and be faithful to do just what He has called us to do in this season and time
As human beings, we often want to see immediate results. Bearing the burden of a vision which may take many years to take shape is not very "us". But God's perspective on time is so different from our concept of time.
"But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day." (2 Peter 3:8)
It isn't easy, but we are still thankful, for He has promised us that we are not alone on the journey. He has in fact sent some people to walk alongside us. (met up with Kel and xm this afternoon.. thank girls for your support =p)
Most importantly, we are so glad to have each other on this journey. =)
The Lord reminded me through quiet time today that we have been given a ministry & word of RECONCILIATION...Good Friday's coming up... a great opportunity to meditate on what Jesus has done for all mankind.
A phrase by the author of my devotional material which I really like:
"They need to be reconciled to God and walk in the fullness of that reconciliation."
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Aiyo..sick again
I am sick AGAIN...
I think i catch a cold once every month..so my 7 days MC for work is probably insufficient. I need at least 12 days! ARGH..
So yes.. I am resting at home.. cos the cold was so bad last night that I could not get to sleep...boss told me this morning to rest at home...I also figured I should not go to office to spread the germs to everyone there.
Anyway, I had some work due today actually...so I decided to get down to doing it from home...after I completed 1 out of the 2 pieces of work, boss called to say he completed both liao so I should just rest. Argh..!!! What's wrong with me? haha
Anyway, I hope I recover soon with vit C, fruit juice, water etc.
OKie..off to get more sleep now...zzzzzzzz
I think i catch a cold once every month..so my 7 days MC for work is probably insufficient. I need at least 12 days! ARGH..
So yes.. I am resting at home.. cos the cold was so bad last night that I could not get to sleep...boss told me this morning to rest at home...I also figured I should not go to office to spread the germs to everyone there.
Anyway, I had some work due today actually...so I decided to get down to doing it from home...after I completed 1 out of the 2 pieces of work, boss called to say he completed both liao so I should just rest. Argh..!!! What's wrong with me? haha
Anyway, I hope I recover soon with vit C, fruit juice, water etc.
OKie..off to get more sleep now...zzzzzzzz
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
His grace
I thank God for sustaining me these few days...been learning the importance of praying for everything, small and big...constant prayer expresses our reliance on our Almighty God in all circumstances.
Supposed to start the day with gym workout...but ended up in a nice cafe (run by Christians)...spent some time in quiet with Him, enjoying the music in the background...I thought that was a really good way to start off the day.
Decided that I should have my gym workout during lunch instead, when I feel more up to it =)
Work goes on...and I'm praying that I will be able to make it in time for the wedding rehearsal this evening. =) Looking forward to the wedding of 2 good friends this sat. It will be another beautiful day, I believe.
Supposed to start the day with gym workout...but ended up in a nice cafe (run by Christians)...spent some time in quiet with Him, enjoying the music in the background...I thought that was a really good way to start off the day.
Decided that I should have my gym workout during lunch instead, when I feel more up to it =)
Work goes on...and I'm praying that I will be able to make it in time for the wedding rehearsal this evening. =) Looking forward to the wedding of 2 good friends this sat. It will be another beautiful day, I believe.
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
No TV
Had a super inefficient day yesterday. It's usually quite hard for me to start the engine on monday. So technically, I start work on tuesdays haha! 4 days work-week...
Many of you would know that we do not have a TV at home. I was just thinking about it yesterday, I think my life has become more focused without watching TV. I used to watch quite a bit of drama serials in the past...spent a lot of time in front of the TV. Read from an article somewhere that watching TV actually drains our emotional energy...
Quite glad we made that choice...and I would strongly encourage those who rely heavily on the TV for entertainment to reconsider... =)
Many people have been asking me, "then what do you do at home?" My reply is, "Housework, reading books and papers, listening to music, internet, talking to hubby, spending time with Him...etc"
Ah well.. it's a brand new day and I got to start getting to work! Byezz!
Many of you would know that we do not have a TV at home. I was just thinking about it yesterday, I think my life has become more focused without watching TV. I used to watch quite a bit of drama serials in the past...spent a lot of time in front of the TV. Read from an article somewhere that watching TV actually drains our emotional energy...
Quite glad we made that choice...and I would strongly encourage those who rely heavily on the TV for entertainment to reconsider... =)
Many people have been asking me, "then what do you do at home?" My reply is, "Housework, reading books and papers, listening to music, internet, talking to hubby, spending time with Him...etc"
Ah well.. it's a brand new day and I got to start getting to work! Byezz!
Monday, March 03, 2008
Stretch and strain
Lately, I've been feeling like I am a rubber band and God is stretching this rubber band. Well, I guess He knows best where is my limit, so He would not overstretch. Interestingly, when I thought I was overstretched, He provided me with more strength to move forward...so I figured that He knows my limit best.
Beginning to appreciate why Paul could say,
"But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed: perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." (2 Cor 4:8-9)
Lord, please grant me the strength that I need to persevere in this journey and to rejoice.
Beginning to appreciate why Paul could say,
"But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed: perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." (2 Cor 4:8-9)
Lord, please grant me the strength that I need to persevere in this journey and to rejoice.
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