I don't like such times... Low energy level, less motivation to chiong1 for work...but there're still things to do.
I wonder how people keep their engines up and running all the time. If only I can do the same. =(
I am that sort who definitely needs 7 hours of sleep per day in order to remain focused and alert all throughout the day. Even with the hours of sleep, if stress level shoots up too high, or there's just too much on my table, work or otherwise, I will struggle. Is it just me? Or is this normal huh? Sometimes, I do hope that my life will become simpler.
Maybe what I'm lacking is a regular dosage of exercise. maybe...
Hubby always says that I should learn to relax and accept such times. But I guess, for a person like me, feeling tired and motivation-less becomes a 'problem'.
"Take it easy girl and rest in the Lord..."
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
another heart attack =(
Alamak
Ever since I started working in this firm, I have been receiving heart attacks primarily from my boss lah. (But I must qualify, my boss is still a good boss lah)
Some really last minute stuff cropped up last night.. created quite some stress in me.. and ya.. was stuck in court dealing with the mess today. Aiya...long story..
Kept praying to God to release all the anxiety and stress to Him. Thankfully, He answered my little prayers and kept giving me strength to go on.
Wah.. this job of mine can be really stressful. Working in an adversarial system, ppl fighting aggressively for their cases etc. Lots of uncertainty etc.. cos we don't know it all (only God does). We can only do our best, in a professional manner. Well, I am learning to let go.. and just take things step by step with God. If not, I will really go NUTS! Tough!
"Diana, be strong and courageous by His grace!" ha ha ha
Can't imagine what it will be like if God is not by my side...haha..
Anyway, I am thankful for the short break I am taking now =) STONE...
Ever since I started working in this firm, I have been receiving heart attacks primarily from my boss lah. (But I must qualify, my boss is still a good boss lah)
Some really last minute stuff cropped up last night.. created quite some stress in me.. and ya.. was stuck in court dealing with the mess today. Aiya...long story..
Kept praying to God to release all the anxiety and stress to Him. Thankfully, He answered my little prayers and kept giving me strength to go on.
Wah.. this job of mine can be really stressful. Working in an adversarial system, ppl fighting aggressively for their cases etc. Lots of uncertainty etc.. cos we don't know it all (only God does). We can only do our best, in a professional manner. Well, I am learning to let go.. and just take things step by step with God. If not, I will really go NUTS! Tough!
"Diana, be strong and courageous by His grace!" ha ha ha
Can't imagine what it will be like if God is not by my side...haha..
Anyway, I am thankful for the short break I am taking now =) STONE...
Monday, February 25, 2008
A new week
Last week was a super terrible week. Emotionally down, physically unwell and spiritually challenged...
It didn't help that I had more work and more ministries throughout the week. Actually had to work over the weekend. =( Well, it's always like that, when you are busy, you are really busy, when you are not, it's really super relaxing. =) Weird...
But thank God, I really enjoyed the time with the CG on sat evening. We had dinner together, sang songs and did bible study... =) The time was really well-spent. Had lots to thank God for after that. Thankfully hubby helped me with the preparation for BS, haha..
Had a tough time leading worship on sunday because I was feeling unwell physically. But I thank God anyway for leading me through. Well..there are always ups and downs. The message by Ps D.L was superb, a topic which is very much on my heart, and more so on hubby's!
The Valentine's lunch was quite fun! haha...but I felt super tired after that. Still had to work into the night. I kept praying to God because I was just feeling so stressed..even until today (I am still in office now), I had to keep on praying, to rely on God for strength at work.
Thank God! It's only 930pm and I am almost done with what I had to complete today. Though it may not be a perfect piece of work.
His grace is indeed more than sufficient =) And His power is made perfect in my weaknesses.
It didn't help that I had more work and more ministries throughout the week. Actually had to work over the weekend. =( Well, it's always like that, when you are busy, you are really busy, when you are not, it's really super relaxing. =) Weird...
But thank God, I really enjoyed the time with the CG on sat evening. We had dinner together, sang songs and did bible study... =) The time was really well-spent. Had lots to thank God for after that. Thankfully hubby helped me with the preparation for BS, haha..
Had a tough time leading worship on sunday because I was feeling unwell physically. But I thank God anyway for leading me through. Well..there are always ups and downs. The message by Ps D.L was superb, a topic which is very much on my heart, and more so on hubby's!
The Valentine's lunch was quite fun! haha...but I felt super tired after that. Still had to work into the night. I kept praying to God because I was just feeling so stressed..even until today (I am still in office now), I had to keep on praying, to rely on God for strength at work.
Thank God! It's only 930pm and I am almost done with what I had to complete today. Though it may not be a perfect piece of work.
His grace is indeed more than sufficient =) And His power is made perfect in my weaknesses.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
At the foot of the Cross
Sometimes, it's so easy to miss the point altogether.
It's so easy to start focusing on everything else but not on Jesus and His work on the Cross.
Well, I missed the point altogether, getting all upset over the many things within me and around me...until I am robbed of JOY and LOVE.
2 songs came to mind:
Fill my eyes, O my God, with a vision of the Cross
Fill my heart with love for Jesus the Nazarene
Fill my mouth with Thy praise, let me sing through endless days
Take my will let my life be wholly Thine
Be Thou my vision O Lord of my heart
Naught be all else to me save that Thou art
Thou my best thought by day or by night
Waking or sleeping Thy presence my light
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Valentine's day 2008
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Hehe =) We planned way early for V-day this year.
Decided that we would prepare a meal and make cards for each other.
Haha..I went online to look for recipes, one for beef steak, the other for garden salad dressing. Found them but guess what! Did not have time to do proper grocery shopping so I ended up inventing my own recipe for Spaghetti. =) Figured I would probably make a mess out of the good online recipes.
Hubby prepared grilled salmon...*delicious*.
After work, we each headed off to buy our groceries...he went to Jurong Central... I went to Tiong Bahru. Reached home close to 8pm..started preparing and haha! Only managed to whip up the full meal by 930pm. Crazy right? Became supper for us haha!
Thank God, the food turned out pretty fantastic. He heard our little prayers! =)
And ya...the cards were simple and nice...well we have limited artistic talents.
All in all, it was pretty fun spending our 1st V-day as husband and wife like this.
Friday, February 15, 2008
Comfort in affliction
Been going through quite a bit lately... lot's of internal struggles, pain, etc due to the things I see and experience around me.
Heard His voice yesterday during devotion... a voice which I badly need during this season of growth...
2 Cor 1:1-11...
The message which came across so strongly to an aching heart...He comforts us in our times of affliction and suffering.
Memory verse: 2 Cor 1:3-4
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.
I am grateful...really.
Our faith will be stretched time and again...pressures will not cease, but we put our trust in the One who delivers.
Heard His voice yesterday during devotion... a voice which I badly need during this season of growth...
2 Cor 1:1-11...
The message which came across so strongly to an aching heart...He comforts us in our times of affliction and suffering.
Memory verse: 2 Cor 1:3-4
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.
I am grateful...really.
Our faith will be stretched time and again...pressures will not cease, but we put our trust in the One who delivers.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Disappointment with God?
Some phrases came to mind yesterday.
"Disappointment with God"
"Where is God when it hurts"
"if God is loving why is there suffering"
I am not 'suffering' at the moment, but going through 'suffering' with some others...
When pain is so intense and relief is not yet in sight, it's difficult not to grapple with those issues...
Life is not all rosy...we all know that, but I am beginning to realise that life can be filled with loads and loads of pain. God is our only hope and comfort...
Clinging on to God's sovereignty, faithfulness,unfailing love and goodness... learning to accept that though i may not understand what's going on and I have no answer to the 'whys'...He remains absolutely trustworthy.
Not easy at all.
"Disappointment with God"
"Where is God when it hurts"
"if God is loving why is there suffering"
I am not 'suffering' at the moment, but going through 'suffering' with some others...
When pain is so intense and relief is not yet in sight, it's difficult not to grapple with those issues...
Life is not all rosy...we all know that, but I am beginning to realise that life can be filled with loads and loads of pain. God is our only hope and comfort...
Clinging on to God's sovereignty, faithfulness,unfailing love and goodness... learning to accept that though i may not understand what's going on and I have no answer to the 'whys'...He remains absolutely trustworthy.
Not easy at all.
Monday, February 11, 2008
More about CNY 2008
Where did I stop? Oh ya..
7 feb 2008
Woke up early in the morning to prepare for the arrival of CG. a few CG brothers came by, had lunch, helped hubby with the drilling of holes into the wall in my room cos we wanted to mount a shelf..thank God they offered to help..it turned out that it was super difficult and energy-consuming to drill the holes. If hubby was left to do it alone, I think he would give up after the 1st one.
Then we went to SY's place, and then to KN's place..and then finally to E&M's place for steamboat. It was fun but I felt a bit left out because I was the only sis in the group. Thank God BH turned up at E&M's place. I headed off to meet the HC gang at 9plus and only reached home at 3am. We had fun! Loads of it.
8 Feb 2008
Had to wake up really early cos we had to reach T21 at 830am for worship prac. Haha amazingly, all of us did not forget what we practiced on tuesday evening. God's grace..=) Had a good time worshipping..but was feeling really sleepy cos of the lack of sleep the night before. Then CG headed to MK's place..and then we caught a movie..the ah-long show..quite entertaining.. then I went to meet up with PL at her place..then home sweet home.
Back to work now...quite a bit of inertia, but what to do. That's the prob with long holidays.
Okie.. pictures will come later.
7 feb 2008
Woke up early in the morning to prepare for the arrival of CG. a few CG brothers came by, had lunch, helped hubby with the drilling of holes into the wall in my room cos we wanted to mount a shelf..thank God they offered to help..it turned out that it was super difficult and energy-consuming to drill the holes. If hubby was left to do it alone, I think he would give up after the 1st one.
Then we went to SY's place, and then to KN's place..and then finally to E&M's place for steamboat. It was fun but I felt a bit left out because I was the only sis in the group. Thank God BH turned up at E&M's place. I headed off to meet the HC gang at 9plus and only reached home at 3am. We had fun! Loads of it.
8 Feb 2008
Had to wake up really early cos we had to reach T21 at 830am for worship prac. Haha amazingly, all of us did not forget what we practiced on tuesday evening. God's grace..=) Had a good time worshipping..but was feeling really sleepy cos of the lack of sleep the night before. Then CG headed to MK's place..and then we caught a movie..the ah-long show..quite entertaining.. then I went to meet up with PL at her place..then home sweet home.
Back to work now...quite a bit of inertia, but what to do. That's the prob with long holidays.
Okie.. pictures will come later.
Friday, February 08, 2008
Report on CNY 2008
4 Feb 2008
Spent a whole day in JB with hubby's father-side relatives, it's my first time there. He has 5 uncles...and many many cousins. Some of his cousins already have 2 to 3 kids...a lot right? =) haha..so there were many kids running about in the whole house. Had a great time there...although it was a long day and we had to give out quite number of angbaos. The tricky part was, the kids were running here and there and we had to make sure we did not miss out any of them =) The males sat around a table for dinner..followed by the females who sat around another table. Interesting. Thank God I felt comfortable with all of them. It was a wonderful experience spending the eve of CNY with a whole family of believers.
5 Feb 2008
Woke up late in the morning...visited parents-in-law in Sengkang and headed off to his maternal grandparents' place. Again, had to give out angbaos to his many cousins. The difference is that we are the oldest among his cousins...most of them are still in their teenage years. =) Shortly thereafter, we headed to my own parents' place where my relatives gathered. I had fun, but unfortunately hubby fell ill so he was sleeping quite a bit in the day.
6 Feb 2008
After 2 longs days of visiting...finally we managed to catch some good rest. Woke up rather late, enjoyed some homemade breakfast...had our morning devotion together... (we felt such a great need to be quiet before God after 2 days of much celebration and fun). Headed off to IKEA..bought some stuff which we now realise might not be that suitable.. ARGH! =(..then parents-in-law and WJ came over for steamboat and we had some good family time together.
Well..it's been great..and thank God for sustaining us with strength and grace as we meet up with so many people. More activity to come in the next 2 days.. fun...but hopefully we will not forget He who made us =)
Spent a whole day in JB with hubby's father-side relatives, it's my first time there. He has 5 uncles...and many many cousins. Some of his cousins already have 2 to 3 kids...a lot right? =) haha..so there were many kids running about in the whole house. Had a great time there...although it was a long day and we had to give out quite number of angbaos. The tricky part was, the kids were running here and there and we had to make sure we did not miss out any of them =) The males sat around a table for dinner..followed by the females who sat around another table. Interesting. Thank God I felt comfortable with all of them. It was a wonderful experience spending the eve of CNY with a whole family of believers.
5 Feb 2008
Woke up late in the morning...visited parents-in-law in Sengkang and headed off to his maternal grandparents' place. Again, had to give out angbaos to his many cousins. The difference is that we are the oldest among his cousins...most of them are still in their teenage years. =) Shortly thereafter, we headed to my own parents' place where my relatives gathered. I had fun, but unfortunately hubby fell ill so he was sleeping quite a bit in the day.
6 Feb 2008
After 2 longs days of visiting...finally we managed to catch some good rest. Woke up rather late, enjoyed some homemade breakfast...had our morning devotion together... (we felt such a great need to be quiet before God after 2 days of much celebration and fun). Headed off to IKEA..bought some stuff which we now realise might not be that suitable.. ARGH! =(..then parents-in-law and WJ came over for steamboat and we had some good family time together.
Well..it's been great..and thank God for sustaining us with strength and grace as we meet up with so many people. More activity to come in the next 2 days.. fun...but hopefully we will not forget He who made us =)
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Be contented
Was reminded of this theme through His Word yesterday...CONTENTMENT
Apostle Paul spoke of having learnt the secret of being content (Phil 4:12-13):
"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
The writer of Hebrews exhorts us (Hebrews 13:5)
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,
"Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you."
Am I being content in all circumstances? ...I don't think so... for there are times when I find myself wanting more...especially in such a materialistic world. But I guess that's where my tough training is.
Can I trust God all the days of my life, whether in plenty or in need? I hope so
Apostle Paul spoke of having learnt the secret of being content (Phil 4:12-13):
"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength."
The writer of Hebrews exhorts us (Hebrews 13:5)
Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said,
"Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you."
Am I being content in all circumstances? ...I don't think so... for there are times when I find myself wanting more...especially in such a materialistic world. But I guess that's where my tough training is.
Can I trust God all the days of my life, whether in plenty or in need? I hope so
Reflections after half a year..
We got married on 4 August 2007.. yesterday marked our half a year in marriage.
Interestingly, God spoke and clarified some things last night.
Been rather emotional and anxious lately because of the many things which I have been thinking about...my role at home as a wife and in future a mother; where work in the marketplace fits in; child care arrangements in future; financial needs; time management etc...Basically, many many WORRIES and UNCERTAINTIES.
Well, being a female, I tend to be overwhelmed by worries and uncertainties easily. Stressed out easily...haha =) And God will always bring me back to His Word and remind me of the importance of trusting Him.
I am now convinced that I am in another phase of growth and I am moving into unfamiliar grounds. Super unfamiliar grounds.. haha =p To trust God in unfamiliarity...to hold on to His unchanging promises of providence... to learn what 'partnership' and 'unity' means in marriage...Proverbs 31... haha.. hmm...
God never fails to amaze me even in the midst of all these...and I tell myself, "Diana, you have a long way to go!" haha.. and I am so glad that there are older sisters who have already gone ahead of me...cos I can turn to them when I am lost. =)
Oh well.. take it easy, embrace changes, enjoy the process of growth! That's me, for now!
WG's been supportive.. and that's a blessing.
Interestingly, God spoke and clarified some things last night.
Been rather emotional and anxious lately because of the many things which I have been thinking about...my role at home as a wife and in future a mother; where work in the marketplace fits in; child care arrangements in future; financial needs; time management etc...Basically, many many WORRIES and UNCERTAINTIES.
Well, being a female, I tend to be overwhelmed by worries and uncertainties easily. Stressed out easily...haha =) And God will always bring me back to His Word and remind me of the importance of trusting Him.
I am now convinced that I am in another phase of growth and I am moving into unfamiliar grounds. Super unfamiliar grounds.. haha =p To trust God in unfamiliarity...to hold on to His unchanging promises of providence... to learn what 'partnership' and 'unity' means in marriage...Proverbs 31... haha.. hmm...
God never fails to amaze me even in the midst of all these...and I tell myself, "Diana, you have a long way to go!" haha.. and I am so glad that there are older sisters who have already gone ahead of me...cos I can turn to them when I am lost. =)
Oh well.. take it easy, embrace changes, enjoy the process of growth! That's me, for now!
WG's been supportive.. and that's a blessing.
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